Friday, March 27, 2009

I'm losing my wisdom...

Let me start by saying that every time I visit the dentist he gives me a hard time about my unpulled wisdom teeth.  (The two on the bottom.)  Since they really haven't caused any problems I have cheerfully ignored him while reminding him that he could not badger me about it with much credibility since he also still has two of his.  However, the last time I went he said that there is enough bone loss around my wisdom teeth that food is going to start creeping back behind the gums so that it will not be possible for me to clean them. He said the result would be an abscess that would cause the loss of several other molars in addition to the wisdom teeth, and it'd be an emergency situation then, and a horrible, painful experience. So now I am left with the lesser of the two evils, getting my wisdom teeth out.

When I went to the oral surgeon, the office did one of those panoramic (and really, REALLY flattering… Makes your head look like a medicine ball) xrays and said that the roots are solidly fused to the jaw bone and that they are very close to the nerves. He is hoping to extract them without damaging the nerves (which would result in possible numbness and paralysis of the facial muscles which could be permanent) but if he gets in there and it doesn't look possible he'll just saw off the tooth a little lower than the gum line and let the gums grow over what's left of the tooth. That also sounds horrible. Thank goodness I will be unconscious throughout this. I have a vision of a hacksaw in my mouth, and I'm hoping he doesn't end up sawing my mouth open like a pez dispenser. I'll end up looking like the Jack Nicholson version of the Joker. I'll be off work until I can function without pain medication. 

Oh, and what is it about hearing that someone has upcoming oral surgery that invites others to share their own oral surgery horror stories?  I would rather hear them after I'm healed up, thank you very much. 

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

I think I'm getting too old for this kind of thing...

I'm not working as quickly as I usually do today, I did a major stupidity yesterday. About a half hour before I was due to go home (and I was the only one in the office) an employee came in chatting on his cell phone with my boss. The employee had left his badge in the security office and he was pretty desperate to get it back but everyone had gone home for the day. My boss asked me to try to get in there and retrieve it for him if I could.

I got into the outer office okay, but inside there were several cubicles (two with locking doors) for the security folks. The cubicle walls are about 7 feet high is all, not nearly all the way to the ceiling. I stepped onto a chair and my head was over the top and I could see the badge clearly. So I scooted a table over, but that still wasn't enough to get over the wall, so I scooted over a wheeled contraption that the security folks use for their coat rack, which has a shelf at the top. The guy who lost his badge held this steady while I climbed onto it. Then I swung my leg over, and he's thinking to himself, "Wow, she's pretty good," after which he heard a big WHUMP as I fell to the ground on the other side. Ouch.

But not to worry, I was able to slow my descent by sliding my face against the inner wall of the cubicle, which was thoughtfully lined with some sort of sandpaper-textured burlap. Since I'd had the air knocked out of me (landed on my chest) I wasn't able to get up for a few moments as he desperately cried, "Are you okay?" while he's thinking, "I can't get in there to see if she's alive, the door is still locked!" Anyway, I finally pushed myself into a sitting position and unlocked the door, then I struggled to my feet, went over to the desk, picked up his badge and handed it to him. Then I sat down for a few moments to get my breath back, while he's anxiously asking, "Do you want me to get you a cold cloth?" By this time I was feeling much better, so I said no and we put back all the furniture. He mumbled something about hoping there were no security cameras that caught it. Amen to that.

Anyway, when I got home I looked at where my arm was hurting and there is a lovely bruise there so I wore long sleeves today. I also looked at my knees and they're a beautiful shade of blue and purple as well. Plus I've got another big bruise on my left calf. And when I took off my makeup last night I noticed I have a bruise across the bridge of my nose as well. :::sigh:::  And this morning when I woke up I was incredibly sore. 

I'm obviously not as athletic as I am in my imagination, because that turned out so much better in my head than it did in reality.  But I have to say that for a security office, it wasn't that hard to get in and I take a sort of perverse satisfaction in that. 

Thursday, March 12, 2009

What Susie needs...

Enter your name followed by "needs" (with quotes around both of them together) in Google and list the first 10 responses that make sense.  These are my top 10, number 5 is my favorite:

  1. Auntie Susie needs YOU!
  2. Susie needs to be punished to the fullest extent of the law.
  3. Susie needs your help.
  4. Sweet Susie needs a home.
  5. Susie needs to be my wife so that I can begin the biological process of procreation with a female humanoid.
  6. Mustang Susie needs your votes.
  7. Susie needs to get some guts and self esteem.
  8. Susie Needs our Purrs/Woofs/Purrayers.
  9. Susie needs sleep.
  10. Susie needs a husband, not a sex-toy stimulation.


Wednesday, March 4, 2009

FW: Debate

This is literally a "church signs" debate, being played out in a Southern town, between Our Lady of Martyrs Catholic and Cumberland Presbyterian, a fundamentalist church. From top to bottom shows you the response and counter-response over time.